The Skin Keeps Score - How The Mind & Body Affects The Skin

The skin is more than our body's outer protective layer - it's a storyteller, a scorekeeper. It reflects what we nourish ourselves with, what we hold on to, and the emotions we never let go of. When we think about skin health, most of us think of products, routines, and diet. Not to say those things don't have any effect, because they very much do. However, science shows that our emotions - especially grief and stress - can alter our skin just as powerfully, if not even more.

In 2020, I had such a hard time with my skin. For months I was trying different skin care products, proactive skin care systems, I tried to stop using products altogether, and still, nothing was working. I hated the way my skin looked and felt. My skin was inflamed, sensitive, and breaking out more than ever. What I didn't realize at the time, was that my skin wasn't just reacting to what I was, or wasn't putting on it. It was carrying everything I was holding onto inside.

In May of 2020, during the peak of COVID, my father passed away suddenly in a motorcycle accident. My whole life changed in an instant. The shock, grief, guilt, and every negative emotion you could think of filled me up, and I shoved it down if I'm being honest. Those emotions that I didn't allow myself to fully feel, or move through, just ended up popping up as a reminder on my face.

The Science Behind Grief, Stress, Emotions, & The Skin

When humans go through grief, stress, hardships, or any "negative" emotion, our body responds on a chemical and cellular level. The body is a complex system and you'd be surprised at just how often your body is trying to protect you, oftentimes giving you a negative side effect as a result. Though it really is just doing its best to help you.

Here's what happens internally:

• Stress Hormones (Cortisol and Adrenaline): Emotional stress increases cortisol, one of the biggest baddest stress hormones. Cortisol in relation to the skin, increases a substance called sebum, aka oil. Which in moderate amounts is healthy for the skin, however, the cortisol hormone often creates too much and can cause inflammation. Inflammation leads to acne breakouts, flare-ups of eczema or psoriasis, and a weakened skin barrier.

  
  

• Long-term stress and high cortisol levels can break down collagen and elastin in the skin - the building blocks that keep skin firm, plump, and resilient. Over time this can make the skin thinner, drier, and more prone to irritation. Stress also slows down wound healing by impairing the immune system. This means breakouts might last longer, irritation lingers, and acne scars last for what seems like forever.

  
  

• Adrenaline shifts blood flow away from the skin and redirects to more pressing matters like the muscles and organs in your body, queue in the infamous "fight or flight mode" of the nervous system. This can leave the skin looking dull and tired. Your body has to pick its battles in times of emotional distress. It cares less about your outward appearance, and more about keeping your insides working properly.

So when I say my emotions and circumstances showed up on my skin, it wasn't a poetic attempt - it was a real biological process.

The Weight Of Unprocessed Emotions

Our bodies keep score of what we don't release or process. Negative emotions, if held in, don't just disappear; they ripple through our hormones, nervous system, and even our skin barrier function. Think of it this way, emotions... good or "bad" ones, are just energy in motion. If they are not expressed, then they are stored - and the skin, as our largest organ and barrier to the outside world, often takes the brunt end of the stick and reflects what's unresolved on the inside.

That's why it's common to see:

• Breakouts before a big or stressful event

• Redness or flare-ups during emotional turmoil

• Dull, tired-looking skin during times of grief or depression

• Stress cold sores

The Shift: Skin Healing Through Emotional Healing

My skin didn't begin to heal until I started feeling and living my emotions. Allowing myself to truly feel what I've been trying to avoid. The more I allowed myself to release, whether it was through crying, through talking, or through journaling - the calmer my skin became. My sensitivity lessened, my skin didn't feel so inflamed, and a natural glow started to return.

Science supports this too: when we reduce stress and regulate our emotions, cortisol levels drop, inflammation calms, and the skin has the space it needs to repair itself. It takes a bit of time obviously but theres a noticeable difference.

Tips On Emotional Regulation

• Start journaling. I know, I know, you are probably thinking "Keeping a diary is not going to help me." But here's the thing, you don't even have to do it every day, don't put any expectations on your journal process otherwise you might end up not wanting to do it at all. Keep it light, journal when your emotions are getting to be too much, or when your mind is racing. You don't need a prompt, just spew your thoughts out like a brain dump, you'd be surprised at how much that can lighten the load.

  
  

• Talk to yourself. Reparent yourself, (with a more gentle approach). Now if you do this in public you might look a bit funny, but who cares... just pop some headphones in and you're good to go. Talking to yourself can be like a verbal form of journaling. Express yourself to yourself... Tell yourself that your feelings and emotions are valid and identify where you feel those emotions in your body. Comfort yourself, as you would for a little kid looking for safety. Your inner child is just waiting for that. You deserve to be able to feel safe with your own self.

  
  

• Be straight up with yourself. If you're not okay, if you're sad, angry, or whatever, OWN it. You're not going to get anywhere gaslighting yourself, or your body into thinking you're okay. Your body knows which emotions are traveling through your system, and or, which emotions are stuck. There is no fooling it.

  
  

• Rest! Rest is not a dirty word. The body needs it, and if you're not getting enough of it, your body will for sure let you know.

  
  

• Move your body. Movement is essential for a healthy body. You don't need to go powerlifting or do any crazy pilates. Yoga, walking, dance, light weightlifting, and cycling are all good options. Emotions oftentimes have an easier time moving through the body when the body itself is actually moving. Some data shows that exercise can help lower stress hormones (that also cause skin issues) and elevate feel-good hormones.

  
  

• One of my favorite things to do is read. I'm all into self-help, and spiritual/philosophy books, a lot of them provide really good insight on how to live a more mindful, present life, while navigating hard times and emotions, Some of my favorites are Carlos Castaneda, Don Miguel Ruiz, Michael Alan Singer, Paulo Coelho, and Rhonda Byrne to name a few. If you don't like reading, try listening to a few podcasts instead!

SO basically, our skin is never just skin - it's an extension of our inner world and being. Grief, stress, and unspoken emotions can leave their marks, but they can also guide us toward deeper healing. If you're struggling with your skin, I encourage you to pause and ask yourself not only, 'What products am I using and why?' but also, 'What am I holding onto?' Because sometimes the path to clear radiant skin begins not with a serum, but with giving yourself permission to feel, to release, and to heal. My own journey taught me that skin healing isn't about perfection, it's about connection - with ourselves, our stories, and our emotions.

This is why I approach facials and treatments not just as skin care but as self-care. A chance for you to rest, release, and reconnect. If your skin feels like it's carrying more than you can or want to handle, I would love to hold space for you in my treatment room while you embark on this self-love journey.

Stay tuned for more tips and blogs on self-care and skin care!

XOXO -Naveyah Serai

***Disclaimer; These claims and cases may not be the reasoning behind your personal acne, or skin conditions, and there is always other causes for each condition, but these tips are insightful and often over looked.